A bit of nothing or something

Wasted Energy

2008-02-27T10:06:00.001-08:00

I'm tired of listening to people complain, whine and be down right angry at our President. Why not spend that energy in prayer for him and our country.

That is energy better spent. It WILL make a difference - your anger won't.

Just for fun!

2008-02-20T07:27:00.001-08:00

You Are An ENTP

The Visionary

You are charming, outgoing, friendly. You make a good first impression.

You possess good negotiating skills and can convince anyone of anything.

Happy to be the center of attention, you love to tell stories and show off.

You're very clever, but not disciplined enough to do well in structured environments.

In love, you see everything as a grand adventure. You enjoy taking risks for love.

And if things don't work out, you're usually not too much worse for the wear!

You would make a great entrepreneur, marketing executive, or actor.

At work, you need a lot of freedom to pursue your own path and vision.

How you see yourself: Analytical, creative, and peaceful

When other people don't get you, they see you as: Detached, wishy-washy, and superficial

What's Your Personality Type?

Merry Christmas

2007-12-25T09:16:00.000-08:00

Blogger Laziness

2007-12-22T19:14:00.000-08:00

Hey Friends -
Sorry it has been so long. Busy time of year - and I love it.

Quick update on "the house." (Check the previous post if you don't know what "the house" refers to.) We are at a stand still. We really want to buy the house - but because we are first time homebuyers and my hubby is self employed (just his second year) we have a few things stacked against us. BANKS - They make me want to scream. I mean seriously - we have a budget, we know what we can afford - and we aren't going to get in over our heads... We are still hopeful and diligently seeking God's will.

I must be off. I have to figure our how to wrap a bike for a little boy at our church! :)

House Hunting

2007-11-19T16:39:00.001-08:00

Ok friends - we have been house hunting for some time - though only recently have we become serious. We have been through a number of house and I have easily looked at 300 homes online. No Joke. But we have never had a great "gut" feeling about any of the homes we have looked at...until now.

We looked at a house this weekend that has us buzzing. Seriously it is magical! OK, it is magical to us, maybe not to you. We really want to live in the country, with a yard to play in. And idealy we want an old fixer-upper home with character.

Oh we have found it. What do you think?

It's great isn't it!!!! On the back side - a new addition (2004). So we are praying about this. Praying a lot.

He was amazed at him

2007-10-30T12:45:00.000-07:00

The Faith of the Centurion
Luke 7:1 - 10

“1When Jesus had finished saying all this in the hearing of the people, he entered Capernaum. 2There a centurion's servant, whom his master valued highly, was sick and about to die. 3The centurion heard of Jesus and sent some elders of the Jews to him, asking him to come and heal his servant. 4When they came to Jesus, they pleaded earnestly with him, "This man deserves to have you do this, 5because he loves our nation and has built our synagogue." 6So Jesus went with them. He was not far from the house when the centurion sent friends to say to him: "Lord, don't trouble yourself, for I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. 7That is why I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed. 8For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it."
9When Jesus heard this, he was amazed at him, and turning to the crowd following him, he said, "I tell you, I have not found such great faith even in Israel." 10Then the men who had been sent returned to the house and found the servant well.”

I love it when I read scripture that I have read a hundred times before and yet something so huge jumps out at me it’s like I have never read it before. That’s why the Bible is “The Living Word!”

I read this scripture last night and again today. I can’t get it out of my head. When Jesus heard of the Centurion’s faith he says he was “amazed at him.” Wait on a cotton-pickin’ second – our Lord, the one who knows all, was amazed by the actions of a human. Is that wild or what? To think that I, little me, could amaze Jesus. I want that – I want to amaze Jesus.

The original word for amazed in verse 9 is thaumazo, meaning “to wonder, marvel, be struck with admiration or astonishment.” That is how I think of Jesus, but to think that my faith in Him could lead him to think the same of me. Amazing.

Come, Lord Jesus.

A dog and his vomit...

2007-10-15T18:09:00.000-07:00

I have been battling the bank for two weeks now. Oh, the joy. While we have gotten most of our $774 in overdraft fees back we are still out $237. ARG...$237 is a stinkin lot of money.

So I have climbed my way to the top of the "said" yet un-named bank. I have been called liar, told I'm not being fair and been completely ingnored. In fact it took this bank an entire week to get back to me. But they felt bad about this delay so they gave us $150 back. Oh, how sweet. I know what they were thinking - let's give her a little more of her money back and maybe she'll get off our back. HAHAHA - Knock, knock...guess who's there...it's me, it's me....I have not gone away.

So today I met with yet another bank person. I got nowhere. In fact the lady spent most of the time talking about her history of bank problems - and then about the gas prices, and then about the increase in the cost of eggs and a galloon of milk. I felt like I was in an episode of "PeeWee's Playhouse." I was on the edge of my seat waiting for the word of the day...

The banker went on to tell me that whatever I do I should not close my account and go to another bank. She said that would be foolish. As I have now learned the "ins and outs" of said bank, so this would never happen again. She said if I moved my account to another bank I would just have to learn this lesson all over again. Umm...Ok, probably some truth to that...but nope, not buying it. Nice effort - poor approach.

Before I left I handed the bank lady a complaint letter. I asked her to please give it to her manager and let him know that I will be mailing the same letter to The Federal Bank of Cleveland, The Atterony General, and Commissioner of Commerce and the BBB. She said, "that's great, you shoud submit complaints to them, more people should do what you are doing, then maybe we wouldn't be taken advantage of so often..." It was unbelievable, she was my personal cheerleader. Amazing.

Proverbs 26:11 says, "As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly."

I will be moving banks. It would be foolish not to...

So, as the story goes...

2007-10-02T10:22:00.000-07:00

You have to love banks, don't you? So on Saturday the 22nd of September I deposted a large amount of money into my checking account. The little ticket that I recieved said that the money would POST on Monday the 24th. So I went home and set up all kinds of bills to pay on Monday the 24th. (So I paid bills after I gave them my money....that is how you do it right?)

Well, yes the deposit did post on the 24th, as did all of the bills I paid - however POST does not mean available. Oh, no it doesn't (but they don't tell you that.) So here I am, over a week later, with $642 in overdraft fees.

See we had no idea we were racking up overdraft fees so we kept spending money - and thus getting more and more overdraft fees. Even last night, after I sat down with a banker, to check out my account - and he said everything was fine all caught up - I get a little call this morning that we have more overdraft fees $118! AHHHHH...

Needless to say I am in a battle with the bank and these unethical practices. I'm not a liar or a cheater - I don't spend money I don't have - we don't even use credit cards. I got angry at the bank lady this morning - I wasn't mean just pushy - but it was righteous anger. I won't be backing down on this one - until we get all of our money back. And even then I can't imagine keeping our money at that bank.

Whata bunch of crap-ola!

Novice video; but oooooh so cute!

2007-09-30T19:32:00.000-07:00

2007-09-29T12:55:00.000-07:00

Hey Ya'll...(I laugh a little inside everytime I say that. When i first moved to Ohio I swore I would not ever say "Ya'll." That being said - I still do not call ramdom strangers sweetie - as it still creeps me out when anyone but my sweetie calls me that.)
Anyway - I few more pics just for you. Noah is doing wonderfully. For those of you who knew about Noah's little surgery - the cyst that was removed from his hand was nothing to worry about. He had his stitches removed yesterday - once again he was a champ. PRAISE GOD!
I'm working on some very novice home videos - I'm sure you are all very excited.

Explode

2007-09-24T12:40:00.000-07:00

I'm doing some soul searching.

Do you ever get that feeling that your insides are screaming; (and I'm not talking about gas...) that if you don't quiet yourself you will explode.

That is where I am at.

I believe the Lord is leading me on a new type of journey. Not sure what that looks like. But I am sure that I need to quiet everything around me and listen....so not to explode.

Worship

2007-08-17T13:14:00.000-07:00

I have a family member who is struggling with an addiction. It has been a struggle on and off throughout his life. There are so many "diagnosable" addictions out there – alcohol, drugs, gambling, sex, work, food, money (even playing video games is being considered as a medical addiction)…I am probably missing a few. My family member isn’t the only person I have ever watched live with an addiction, I have seen it a few times. I have been second to a worldly addiction. When a person is addicted to something it overcomes their life – they live for it – often times without being aware of it. Their day is planned around the addiction, everything else becomes second to the desire for a fix. The addiction is the only thing they look forward to.

I often times hear people say "I/they have an addictive personality." That statement seems to make an allowance for whoever is dealing with said addiction. But, don’t we all have an "addictive personality." Don’t we all at one time or another become consumed with something. And then when that "something" is gone, over, finished, or done we crash – we have put so much energy, excitement, life into that something that when it is over we are left empty.

Yes, I do believe that some are more prone to certain addictions. I believe that alcoholism is real, that we can live to eat instead of eat to live – and that it maybe is a chemical imbalance. But I also wonder this: Don’t we all have addictive personalities – hasn’t our God designed us with addictive personalities – haven’t we been created to worship? Designed to worship Jesus?

It is our very nature, our design to worship.

Worship is all consuming, it is over-powering, it looks irrational, maybe out of control – it changes and molds us, it defines us. Worships takes up our time and consumes our minds. The question is, "what are you going to worship?"

We have been created to worship God, to worship our creator, to worship LOVE itself. If we are intent and focused on worshiping our creator is there room to worship anything else? No. But it is in those low times, the hard times, times of change or decisions when Satan sneaks in and says "I can fix this for you, just take a drink and it will be better…"

Because we are created to worship t is so easy for Satan to come into our lives and get us to worship something besides God - to be in love with something other than Jesus. Because you are created to worship you are going to worship something. You are going to worship that something with all you have – just imagine if you made the decision to put all of the effort, all of that life and energy into worshiping love itself.

Food

2007-08-17T12:57:00.000-07:00

Noah has started eating solid foods! I'm sure you are all as excited as I am. We had planned on waiting until he was six months - but every time we would sit down to eat Noah would get upset - look at our food - and cry. Poor thing.

He has had cereal, bananas, and peas. He isn't a huge fan of the cereal. But seriously, it doesn't look good or smell good, so I don't blame him. The bananas and peas he loves. They are homemade so I know they taste good!

Enjoy the pics!

Vote

2007-07-11T13:54:00.000-07:00

Tonight at church leadership counsil we will vote whether or not we will allow PET dogs to attend weddings.

It is my opinion that this is a waste of time.

Sorry - I love dogs too - but I would rather not have one soil my wedding gown or bite my grandmothers finger off.

More Pictures

2007-07-06T07:02:00.000-07:00

We are doing well. Noah is growing like a weed. He weighed 14lbs 4oz at his 2 month checkup! Putting him the 95th percentile. He is a bit chubby - but we like it.

Noah is a great baby. He has slept 8 or more hours at night since 7 weeks and is now sleeping almost 12 at 14 weeks! Yea, for having him on a wonderful schedule.

Seriously! I cannot figure out how to get the pictures below my text. Whatever. Hope you enjoyed the pictures.

Birth through 9 weeks

2007-06-01T08:31:00.000-07:00

Sorry it has been so long - to the two of you who maybe read this.

Noah will be nine weeks old tomorrow! He was born March 31, 2007 at 8:54PM after 17 hours of labor. Yeah, seriously 17 hours. He was 9lbs, 22in. He is now 13lbs 6oz - growing like a weed

Noah is very healthy - smiling, cooing, and holding his head up like a champ. I think he is advanced for his age. Haha...

I will fill you in on my thoughts of motherhood and the joys Noah has brought us later. For now just a few pictures.

6 days

2007-03-19T07:59:00.000-07:00

Just a quick update - it has been a while.

Yes, I am still pregnant. Only 6 days until my due date. Which means, I could have this boy anytime - in the next 14 days! First time moms are typically late. :( However my Doctor thinks I will have this little one before the end of the week. At least that is what he said last week. I will see him again later today - we'll know more then.

I am feeling relatively uncomfortable. I wouldn't say it is terrible - but certainly not fun anymore. People are giving me all kinds of advice as to how to get labor started - spicy foods, rasberry leaf tea, walking, bouncing on a yoga ball, drinking castor oil (sick)...and a few others I won't go into.

So I wait. Everytime I feel the slightest pain in my abdomen I get excited thinking it is a contraction. But so far the feelings have not built up to anything - I am actually beginning to wonder if I am making the feelings up on my head.

I'll keep ya posted.

Baby Noah 3D ultrasound

2007-01-16T10:18:00.000-08:00

We had our 30 week ultrasound today. It was done with 3D/4D technology - amazing! Everything looks great. Noah is measuring a little over a week ahead of schedule at 3lbs 10oz.
Enjoy the pictures!

Truth

2006-12-13T08:57:00.000-08:00

Truth is true - even when no one knows it.
Truth is true - even when no one admits it.
Truth is true - even if no one agrees with it.
Truth is true - even if no one follows it.
Truth is true - even if no one but God grasps it fully.
("True For You, But Not For Me" Paul Copan)

I have little, if any, tolerance for relativism.

NICE!!!

2006-12-04T09:56:00.000-08:00

Tales of Pregnancy: A specimen and a charliehorse

2006-11-29T11:15:00.000-08:00

All in all the pregnancy is going well. It is a beautiful thing....

A SPECIMEN

Each time I arrive at the the OB's office I have to give a specimen. They check for sugar and protien. Now in years past when I have had to give a specimen I have always been handed a sealed sterilized container, a detailed set of intructions on collecting the specimen, and told, when finished, to place the specimen in the little door behind the toilet. This isn't so when I go for my monthy OB check up.

Upon being called back for my appointment I am told to go collect my speciman and then BRING IT to the exam room! No sealed cup, no instructions, and no little door. There is a stack of dixie cups in the bathroom for my deposit and then I have to carry the specimen through the hallway to my exam room. If it aweful, pure terror. I am so afraid that between the bathroom and the exam room I am going to trip and dump my dixie filled cup that I actually have to silently talk myself into leaving the bathroom each month.

Oh, one more thing about collecting a specimen while pregnant. Because my stomach continues to grow - I have to blindly collect the speciman. That's right, I can no longer see what I am doing to collect. JOY!

A Charliehorse

I hadn't had a charliehorse in years, that was until I became pregnant. Now if my calcium or potassium levels get the slightest bit low I am awoken at night with pain and a crippled up leg.

Early this morning a fun charliehorse woke me up from a deep, deep sleep. And they don't wake you up with a "good morning," or "can I bring you breakfast in bed." Instead it is intense cramping pain. This morning I woke up thrashing and spraying out a few choice words. I know the pain will cease if I can just straighten my leg and pull my toes towards me, but guess what - I can no longer reach my toes if my leg is straight. So I struggle, thrashing. I get it under control, then my husband says "is everything all right?"

So tonight we are rehearsing the "what to do when Angela gets a Charliehorse" plan.

It's A Boy!!!!

2006-11-01T08:36:00.000-08:00

We found out yesterday that we are having a boy! He is healthy and VERY active. The Ultrasound Technician had to chase him all over the place to get a good look at him. Though we didn't get to see him suck his thumb he was trying hard to get his hand to his mouth.

This is Noah's first picture!

Campaign Commercials

2006-10-17T11:03:00.000-07:00

I *hate* the political campaign commercials that are running nonstop. They are whiney, flakey, and incomplete.

Though I have to admit it is a very clever and useful way to "educate" those who don't take the time to educate themselves.

13 Weeks and 158bpm

2006-09-20T13:14:00.000-07:00

Ahh, life - sometimes it comes at you fast. You just have to breath in and breath out - and know that it is good. And then take a nap.

I imagine to some of you the title of the entry is a bit cryptic - but others of you have it figured out.

Let me unpack it.
13 weeks - how many weeks pregnant I am.
158bpm - how many beats per minute the little ones heart is pumping along at. Some speculate 158bpm could only be a girl.

So now you know - we were surprised and excited too.

Expected Due Date: March 25

As If I Hadn't Already Noticed

2006-08-15T09:57:00.000-07:00

Ya know - I just don't understand some people. About an hour ago an individual walked into my office to discuss a few things and upon leaving told me I need to lose a few pounds, that I was really looking nice for a while, but the extra weight is not flattering.

Thanks, Thank you for pointing that out to me - because I hadn't noticed.

Internal Struggle

2006-06-19T08:36:00.000-07:00

And the preacher ended with "just take a few minutes to be silent and hear His voice. And when you hear His voice don't second guess it."

The crowd fell silent - listening. I listened. A clear voice spoke to my heart and said three small words. Three small words I didn't want to hear, three small words I'm not ready to hear, three small words I wasn't expecting to hear.

And now I can't stop second guessing it. I am battling my own flesh.

I will elaborate more later.

to be still

2006-04-14T12:09:00.000-07:00

Months have passed since the last time I posted. An excuse, busy. April 1st I became a Mrs….yea! It was a wonderful and the days following have been equally good.

Planning for the wedding day was fun, a bit stressful and tiresome, but overall an adventure. For years I had said I would never have a wedding – and to some our wedding would not fall into the “big” category, but for me it did. Because I work for a church, and moved from Minnesota to Ohio to work at the church – the people of my congregation have become very important to me – so we invited them all. The church people, paired with family and friends put us just over 230 people – it was a glorious day – fun was had by all. I do have to admit that in the days coming up to the wedding a few details became big deals. But in those moments I was able to step back and reevaluate.

Anyway for weeks I have basked in the excitement of getting married, seeing my family, moving, and honeymooning (Savannah, GA – pictures to come soon) I loved this time, a time of preparation and joy – all blessings. All of this preparing has made me incredibly busy.

Today, I went to the local Christian book store, to get some music for the youth. I found the music I was looking for and then took a look around the rest of the store. As I strolled around the store I was unable to keep myself from paging through one book after another. Soon I was sitting at a small table in the back of the store, coffee in hand, with a pile of about 10 books. Ah, I love this, I thought. I sat and read – looking through each book. For the first time in weeks my spirit was quieted, I was calm, still maybe, and able to engage. I left with two books – The Ragamuffin Gospel, by Brennan Manning, something I have been meaning to read for some time, and The Air I Breathe, by Louie Giglio.

Brown and Bubbly?!?

2006-02-06T08:50:00.000-08:00

Is anyone else turned off by Diet Pepsi's "Brown and Bubbly" slogan? ICK!! It sounds like a stomach ailment.

Thoughts on church – please chime in

2006-01-31T12:14:00.000-08:00

As a children and youth minister I am constantly fielding individuals thoughts, beliefs and opinions on church. People don’t come to church for only one purpose, or for the same reason as the person in the pew next to them – right or wrong, they don’t.

So why should we go to church? Why do you go to church? Do you serve the church or does the church serve you? Is Sunday morning church (worship) a time set aside to praise and worship God or is it a time to get “filled up” so you can make it through to next Sunday. What is the purpose of a sermon – to help discern scripture, to teach you how to live, to get you excited about your faith, to “change” you…I don’t know – but I do know that there are a whole lot of ideas out there as to what is right.

In my opinion Sunday morning church is to worship – community worship. A person should be in the Word, study, and prayer the rest of the week to remain “filled.” However by-and-large this is not how churches or those who attend view church – a result of years of tradition, culture, and probably laziness. So knowing this, does the purpose of a church service change?

There is a whole gob grey area within this subject, I know – but please chime in with your thoughts.

Temperament

2006-01-24T11:05:00.000-08:00

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things.
Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life.
You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation.

You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon.
Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall.
You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others.

At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults.
Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion.
A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

What Temperment Are You?

Tagged

2006-01-23T07:18:00.000-08:00

OK, Eric has tagged me - I guess that is one way to get me to update this thing.

Three things people probably don't know about me:

1 - I tape General Hospital everyday! Yup, it is true I am addicted to it. I know it is crap and I should stop, but I like it. I was once called a heathen by a peer in ministry for my GH habit.

2 - My favorite topping for popcorn is MALT VINEGAR! Yum - you should give it a try.

3 - I hate clowns. Yes, I know hate is a strong word, but it is true. They freak me out - when I am around them I get nervous and clam up. And they chase children around and don't talk - freaky and weird.

OK, that's that. I tag Jenn.

ANNOUNCEMENT

2005-11-30T12:18:00.000-08:00

I have a an announcement folks!

I am getting married!

YUP - it is true. He proposed on Friday- I am floating, I am so excited. At least I think that is why I feel like I am floating. I have just recently taken a full dose of day-time cold medicine and that tends to give the same floaty feeling.;)

I believe we will be wed on April 1 - just four months from tomorrow.

The two of us will be funding our day ourselves - so if ya have any wedding tips pass them my way.

The time has come...

2005-11-08T12:22:00.000-08:00

I do suppose the time has come for a picture of Brett. We had a wedding to attend this past weekend. So we both got spiffed up and headed to Cincinnati. The wedding was nice. I absolutely loved the message the pastor gave - it was personal and relevant. NICE! The reception was extravagant - an ice sculpture and the whole bit - not my thing, but it wasn't my wedding.

The beard is a new thing. It isn't my favorite - but, it isn't my face.

Prayer request

2005-10-25T12:18:00.000-07:00

Hey All -

Please check out Kate's blog and add Little Joe, his mom, Kate and her family to your prayers.

A bit chilly

2005-10-21T11:29:00.000-07:00

It's a cold, rainy Friday. I just want to curl up on my couch with a warm blanket and watch TV - maybe plug in a movie. I wish I a had a working fire place. I'm struggling to get anything done at work. I have a whole gob of details that need to be tended to and my office is trashed.

So here I sit, at my desk, listening to a recording of Tony Campolo title "Christians in Politics." Sigh...It makes my head spin. I won't get into details. I can't sum up what I think about Campolo, but I have a great deal of respect for him. I don't always agree with him, however his opinions and beliefs are always very well researched and line up with scripture. I think he is wise. I am currently reading a book by him and Brian McLaren titled "Adventures in Missing the Point - how the culture-controlled church neutered the Gospel. It is interesting - I'll comment more on it when I finish. Though if anyone has read it I would enjoy dialoguing about it.

Ok, back to work. Have a great weekend.

What? What does this mean?

2005-10-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

You are a Square. What a weirdo.

What kind of Sixties Person are you?
brought to you by

2005-10-03T22:48:00.000-07:00

Ahh, home. It is always good to get home after a full day of work. I am sitting at my small dining room table with my laptop. Listening to the television and drinking a beer. Yes, I am drinking a beer. And it isn't the wimpy type - it is Killians. I don't typically come home and have a beer. But tonight it sounded nice (not to relieve stress or help myself think - it just sounded nice), and if I were a smoker I would probably have one burning in an old astray, situated on my left side. Being left-handed I imagine that is the side it would be on.

Where to begin. I'm not sure. Life is good, ministry is good, and yes I am enjoying a wonderful relationship, though not without hiccups. It has been 5 years since I have been in a relationship of this type. I am so thankful for those five years - I am also thankful for the fallout I had just over 5 years ago. It is then that I started to get to know myself. I won't go into details, but it is in these years that I have learned how to allow God to use me (though by no means do I have this completely figured out.)

...though not without hiccups. What does that mean? It means people aren't kidding when they say relationships are work. It means I am learning to articulate my thoughts and feelings, allowing myself to be vulnerable. Eek - I had no idea how terrible I was at this. It means discussing differences and then understanding just a little bit more about someone’s heart. For me it has meant really leaning on the Lord. As a couple, taking "stuff," baggage, to the alter - and faithfully turning around and not looking back.

Night All. Sleep tight.

Long Time

2005-10-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, I apologize to all of you who have checked up on me for the past months and found nothing. I'm a slacker - what can I say.

Because I am at work this post will be brief. But I will construct something a bit more in-depth, tonight, after work.

Ministry is good. I believe we are on the edge of great change (shouldn't we always be?) and I am leaning on that excitement. We have a number of outings planned - it is my hope that good, steady relationships are built during these times.

I have been at my church for 2 1/2 years. I had a bit of a scuffle (un-stinking-believable) with a member a week and a half ago. I didn't cry (and it was cry worthy) so I gave myself a pat on the back for finally having tough skin. Though I replayed the conversation in my head for days, and it really got to me - so maybe I don't really have tough skin.

Brett (the boyfriend) is good. We have been dating for four months. This is a long, long time in the history of "Angela." I am learning a whole lot about myself and about relationships. More on this later....

Harry Potter. I can't wait for book seven.

The Barbarian Way, by Erwin McManus - read it.

More later. Blessings!

A Girlie Moment

2005-08-04T10:55:00.000-07:00

I know you all care deeply about my dating life. So I thought I would share a photo of what was waiting for me in my office this morning! So sweet *grin*

Sigh....

More Pics Added

2005-07-21T06:25:00.000-07:00

Here is a personal favorite - this is my pastor.

Belize Pics

2005-07-19T11:52:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pics from Belize. I have not loaded my own on to the site yet, but these are good. Enjoy. I will tell a few stories later in the week.

PICS

Quick Update

2005-07-08T11:39:00.000-07:00

Hi All -

Sorry it has taken me so long to let you know I made it back from Belize. It was an incredible trip - more than I ever imagined. I have Middle School Church Camp Sunday - Friday. I will update you on Belize when I return.

Work is terribly busy right now. Unpacking my thoughts about Belize, preparing for Camp, and organizing VBS has me overwhelmed. Oh, to go back to Belize where the Spirit is rich and priorities are few. Sounds nice.

I know Church camp is good for the kids. But honestly, I dread it. I'm the type of person who needs time to myself - an evening alone or even an entire day to entertain my thoughts. Camping for 5 nights with 100 middle school kids does not offer this time. Only with the help of the Lord will I make it. My time is not my own - I know this, in my head, convincing my heart of it is a challenge.

Blessings.

Destination Belize

2005-06-16T17:23:00.000-07:00

Hey All - I have a prayer request!

Saturday at 4:00AM 14 of us will depart for a mission trip to Belize. We have been planning this trip for months. The mission team is made up of 5 youth and 9 adults - with myself being the team lead. This is ground breaking stuff for our church, particularly for our youth - as a few adults have done some mission work in years past.

I am overwhelmed with excitement, anticipation and some anxiety. From time to time I am a little wigged out by the enormity of the task at hand - the Great commission. But all in all I know the Lord will pave our way.

While in Belize we will be doing a number of different ministries - mercy ministry, door to door evangelism, VBS, 5 worship services, and some light construction. Our plates are full! The preparation for the trip has been both fulfilling and daunting - but I believe we are ready (as ready as we can be.)

We will be staying in a hotel in Belize City and travel to Bermuda Landing each day to do our ministry. The last day (Friday, June 24) we will take an excursion to Caulkin Caye where we will get to see Mayan Ruins and go snorkeling. Fun!

Please keep all of us in your prayers. Thanks so much. I'm looking forward to letting you all know how it goes.

For His Kingdom,
Angela

Wedding Coordinator

2005-06-04T14:31:00.000-07:00

I have served as the wedding coordinator at my church for almost two years now. I originally took the position to make a little extra money – not at all because I enjoy working with brides.

I have turned in my resignation as wedding coordinator, but I said I would stick around until they found a replacement. I am now wishing I would have just quit. I despise the job – and with every wedding I work I become more and more pissy towards them. I cannot believe the money dropped on weddings, it makes me nuts. Save your money people – put a down payment on house. Elope!!

I am working a wedding as I type this. The ceremony is in progress. I had to open the church three hours prior to the service for ample time for the bridesmaids and bride to get ready, as well as for pictures. BUT the bride and groom didn’t want to see each other before the ceremony so more pictures will be taken following the ceremony, while family and friends wait at the reception nearly famished. Fine, if you want to wait until the ceremony to see each other – but this couple had been living together for some time – so why bother, whatever.

Words of advice from my experience:
1. Just because they are family or your best friend doesn’t mean they can sing – please spare us all.
2. Brides – unless they are all sisters, there is really no need for 8 bridesmaids.
3. Brides, if you know funds are short please don’t insist your bridesmaids have their hair done “professionally.” We did that for prom.
4. Debt occurred due to wedding expenses is not justifiable!
5. Just because you met someone once doesn’t mean you have to invite them to your wedding. Smaller is better.
6. Details – don’t let them ruin your day.

For those who prefer dogs

2005-05-11T10:33:00.000-07:00

I don't hate cats, but I like dogs a whole gob more. Here is a stress relief game for those of you who favor dogs. Cat lovers - beware.

!!!!!!

2005-05-11T08:32:00.000-07:00

Just got a call from mom. Her biopsy results came back negative.

Thanks for your prayers. Thank you Jesus!

Saturday

2005-05-08T23:02:00.000-07:00

I will be officiating a funeral on Saturday. Sigh...this is really strange to me, not something I ever imagined myself doing. My pastor would typically do the funeral service but he will be vacationing on a cruise by Saturday, so the family requested me.

The service will be rather laid back, at the request of the family. It is going to be a “biker funeral” – as Bill (the deceased) his wife, and most of his friends were huge bikers. It sounds like many of those who will attend the service will come by way of their Harley. Bill has been cremated, and will be transported from the funeral home to the burial site on a Harley. Bill had requested this type of service. He knew he was going to pass. He fought a long battle with cancer.

I could use some prayers for this. Also remember Bill’s family and friends in your prayers.

Dijon Salmon

2005-05-06T10:25:00.000-07:00

Maybe this is a corny idea – I am going to post my favorite recipes from time to time. I enjoy cooking, and I think I am fairly good at it (thanks to having a mom who is a fabulous cook.) I love salmon, so I make it two or three times a week.

The amount of any given ingredient varies depending on the size of your salmon fillet.

Ingredients:
Salmon fillet, any size, boned
Lemon Juice
Dijon Mustard
Ground Pepper
French Fried Onions

Preheat oven (or toaster oven) to 375 degrees. Wash and dry fillets. Spray Pam or similar product over Pyrex or tin foil pan or rectangular pan (depending on amount and size of portions.) Place fillet in pan. Drizzle with Lemon Juice. Spread fillet generously with Dijon Mustard. Sprinkle with Pepper. Top with French Fried Onions. Bake for 10 – 20 minutes or until fish flakes easily.

If fillet was not skinned before cooking, simply guide a spatula between skin and fish and lift fish away from the skin.

I usually prepare this with a salad or steamed spinach.

Hope you enjoy!

bAg

2005-05-05T17:11:00.000-07:00

First – my retreat was great last week. I have to schedule lengthy, solitude time for myself more often. Being still with God is a precious gift from him. As entertaining as my own thoughts are to me, I need to be more deliberate about hushing myself up and listening to God.

CAPTIVE FREE – this past weekend we hosted Captive Free at our church. They are a Christian Band/Team, made up of 6 young people (18 – 23 in age) The team tours for a year, basically living out of a 15 passenger band – sleeping every night at a different host family (no way could I handle this lifestyle.) The band held a concert on Saturday night and led us in worship on Sunday morning. This style of worship is completely foreign to our congregation. Oh, it was a wonderful time. No doubt rustled the feathers of a few individuals, but that is OK. The kids loved it – it was good to see them so interested. I had one 6th grader come up and ask me “Angela, are you sure God likes us worshipping Him to this kind of music?” Sigh…YES, YES, I know He likes it. I was just excited the 6th grader was thinking of it as worship and not as a concert.

PRAYER – my mom is having a biopsy on a couple of lumps in her breast on Monday. If you could lift her in prayer that would be great.

bAg – Hey look – Webster says I say the word “bag” correctly!
Main Entry: 1bag Pronunciation: 'bag also 'bAg'

Coming from Minnesota I say the word “bag” with a long “A.” I have tried pronouncing it like a Native Ohioan but have not been successful.

Hello All!

2005-04-25T10:42:00.000-07:00

Oh boy it has been a while since the last time I posted (thank you Jenn for being a faithful reader of my ever-so enlightening and increasingly intriguing blog…. ;)

So what is going on in the life of ANGELA?

I have been crazy busy for the last three weeks. Church (my work) is going….OK. I believe we have come to a serious decision making point in the ministry. Sigh…the children’s ministry is going well, while the youth ministry continues to be a struggle. A little background – before I came on board as the youth director it had been nearly a decade since any type of youth ministry had taken place at the church I serve. This makes for a serious uphill battle. I really believe that a large part of the congregation figured if they brought in a young-spunky-youth director who would sing goofy songs and jump up and down at the pulpit that youth would start to ooze out of the woodwork. Well, incase you haven’t already guessed – this isn’t happening. Oh don’t get me wrong, I have sung goofy songs (including the hooky-poky), debuted a number of puppets, jumped up and down at the pulpit, and pasted on a goofy smile to show my enthusiasm about an Easter egg hunt. So my question is, “where do we/I go from here? Should I continue to put gobs of time into the current youth or turn my focus almost completely on the children’s ministry?” Or should I be asking myself this, “Should I throw in the towel? Am I able to utilize my gifts here?” Ugg…………

Not all is completely lost with the youth, just yet. This June, I will be traveling to Belize for a week long mission trip along with 5 youth and a handful of adults. This could potentially build some momentum. We are doing a whole gob of preparation right now – but the trip is not a priority to the youth. Three of the five youth have soccer games every Sunday, thus missing meetings – I dislike soccer immensely. If ya think of it keep this trip in your prayers.

OK, on to better things.

Despite struggles with work, personally I feel awesome! I feel like I am at my best, back in the game – enjoying the heck out of everyday. I quit eating garbage and started working out regularly in November and have dropped just about 25 pounds. YES! It feels good to feel good. Spiritually I am believing God is who He says He is more and more everyday – and with that I am also believing I am who God says I am more everyday. The Lord is no doubt working in my heart, chipping away some junk. This past week I learned that God’s paddle is much larger than mine ever will be – so I might as well learn to respond with Grace and love rather than trying to prove I am right.

Well my friends – I know this is long, but I have a final request. Tomorrow I leave for a retreat that runs through Friday. I will be meeting up with a bunch of other nerdy youth directors (my favorite people to spend time with.) The retreat is titled Annual Advance; I look forward to it every year. This is a visioning retreat. We will have a full 24 hours of solitude. The solitude time is for planning and visioning, praying, resting, and just being still. If you think of it say a prayer for me – that I would hear God’s whisper, that His will would be clear to me, that I would have a peace that surpasses my own understanding, and that I would get some needed rest. Oh, yes, I have to preach later in May, so prayers for this message would be great, too. (I know, I ask a lot)

Blessings.

So Now What?

2005-04-01T09:55:00.000-08:00

I moved almost two weeks. Moving is exhausting, but fun. Yesterday I finished cleaning my old apartment and turned in my keys. With any luck I’ll get most of my deposit back.

My new place is wonderful! I’m living in half of a house out in the country; on a horse farm (the owners have 2 horses.) It has high ceilings, a huge screened in porch that runs the length of the house, gobs of windows, and plenty of room for me to dance. (Though I am really not any good at dancing, it is one of my favorite things to do.) I have lots of room to entertain at my new place, something my last apartment didn’t lend itself to. I enjoy entertaining and cooking for others, and I am looking forward to the company of friends at my new place. I have not started decorating yet, but already this house is homier than my old apartment. The owners/my neighbors, of my new place, are members of my church. Over the past two years they have become 2 of my best friends. They are a blessing to me.

Today marks my two year anniversary at my church, as well as the end of my original contract. Phew, what a ride it has been. No doubt this makes me a hair emotional. I considered coming into work this morning with a party hat on. I mean lets be honest, this is one of my longest commitments ever… So now what? My new contract is still “under-construction.” I have asked for a few changes in my contract – a 40 hour week, it is currently 50, an extra week of vacation, and no timeline as to when my contract expires (with time stipulations if I would decide to leave or be asked to leave, as well as a scheduled annual review in September.)

It has been a crazy two years. I had incredibly high expectations of myself and of the church I serve when I arrived. I defiantly imagined the youth ministry being “bigger” by now. I imagined more intensity, more commitment, and more youth. Is it my fault that we’re not where I hoped? Umm, I have no doubt I have made some mistakes, so some of it surly is my fault, but defiantly not most of it. The church body that I serve is amazing, but it is also a product of its environment and our culture. Priorities are often misplaced and money is a spiritual stronghold. But this does not mean that it isn’t capable of growing and glorifying Christ. I certainly wouldn’t want to serve a church that thought they had it all together. I would be terribly concerned if any person or body thought they had God completely “figured out.”

So, here’s what I hadn’t imagined. Two years ago you couldn’t have convinced me I would feel “in-place” in Springfield, Ohio. I never would have imagined I could love the in imperfect body of Christ like I love the people at the church I serve. I could not have imagined my faith looking so different in two short years. I never would have guessed that seeing a teenager have a “God-ah-ha” moment would make me want to cry. When I moved here I didn’t know a soul, not a single person. I never could have imagined I would be blessed with the friends I have now, and the understanding I have for Christ’s importance of relationships between friends.

“My commandment is this: “Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:12 – 14

GUANO

2005-03-08T21:02:00.000-08:00

AWESOME!! I now have links to other fabulous blogs. Thanks Eric, for helping me out - you have marvelous HTML skills.

Memory

2005-03-08T14:29:00.000-08:00

For as long as I can remember I have had an excellent memory (haha.) Seriously though, I can typically remember dates as well as minor details from any given conversation. As nerdy as it is I believe I have even taken a bit of pride in my memory skills.

In the past few weeks my memory has failed me miserably! I have missed more than one appointment as well as forgotten details from conversations I have just had. (I know I have forgotten these details because those I am talking with are quick to say "I just told you that.") Arg! This is so disturbing to me. I am not concerned that my lapse in memory is any strange medical problem. I believe it is a combination of many others things. I don't have one way of keeping track of my schedule - I write little reminders all over the place, or just file them away in my Brain. I am terribly busy right now, my mind is spinning with work and gobs of other stuff. I am very much a mental processor. So at times I get so caught up in the ongoing entertainment in my head that I believe I forget I have more pressing things at hand.

So anyway, I have been researching Handhelds/PDAs or whatever you call them. I took a trip to Office Max today to take a look at them. While I am looking over the little gizmos and talking to the so called "store expert" my phone rings. I ignored the call, a message was left. On my way out of the store I retrieved my message. It was my guitar teacher asking me where I was reminding me that I was 15 minutes late for my lesson. Sigh....

Hope all is well for all of you.

Dynamite Fun

2005-02-28T10:29:00.000-08:00

The following youth activity was inspired by Jenn, which was inspired by Napoleon Dynamite. I have to give credit where it is due.

If you haven’t seen Napoleon Dynamite, you need to. Don’t bother renting, just buy.

“The opening scene sets the stage for what we can expect from the film's antihero, Napoleon Dynamite. On the bus to school, Napoleon surreptitiously ties fishing line to a plastic action figure and tosses it out the window. He gleefully trolls the plastic hero behind the bus—for no apparent reason other than the joy of simpleminded (and typically harmless) mischief.” Movie Review

Last week I had three junior high youth in my car. Junior high kids are no doubt my favorite. The four of us had talked about Napoleon Dynamite in the past, so I knew they were familiar with the movie. While driving down the road I pulled an action figure, tied to string, out of my bag (OK it was Spongebob, I don’t have a plethora of action figures on hand.) The kid in the back seat throws Spongebob out the window and we watch his square-pants tumble and bounce. Pure fun!! I was laughing to hard I thought I was going to wet myself.

It is moments like this I think to myself “I can’t believe I’m getting paid for this!”

Change

2005-02-23T22:30:00.000-08:00

A couple notes of change for today. One extremely good, one a little less exciting.

The good stuff first. The lead singer of KORN, Brian Head Welsh, gave His life to Christ. Wow, pretty amazing. He has left the band. I am encouraged by the number of youth that this could impact in a positive way. This link is worth checking out.

The not so good stuff, IMO. The Vikings traded Randy Moss today. What a bummer.

Relief

2005-02-22T11:05:00.000-08:00

I have already received my tax return, and spent it. I used it to pay off credit cards. I am happy to announce I am now completely free of all credit card debt! Yippee-do a little dance! What a great feeling. Credit cards are evil - they are of Satan. I believe I may be an oddity having no credit card debt at age 25.

Two Years Gone By

2005-02-22T02:38:00.000-08:00

It is hard to believe that it is two years ago this past weekend I interviewed for the position I now hold as Director of Children and Youth Ministries at High Street UMC. The custodian at High Street uses a citrus smelling floor cleaner. Whenever he cleans the floor and I get a whiff of the citrus smell I am transported back to the first time I stepped into High Street. It is a good memory.

The past two years have been great. To be honest I remember very little of my first year; not because it was bad (it wasn’t, at all) but maybe because I was so completely over stimulated with change that my mind just couldn’t take on that much.

It is hard to imagine my life without the relationships I have made in the last two years. My parents, in Minnesota, and my sister, in Florida, still remain my best friends, and most constant support. I have been so blessed with new friends and REAL relationships in my transition that I am often overwhelmed. Springfield has become a home for me (not quite like mom and dad’s.) Springfield is more than familiar to me, it has become home – that is a good feeling. It isn’t the place as much as the people that have made this place home for me. I am reminded of the importance that Jesus puts on friendships; “My commandment is this: love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friend.” (John 15: 12 – 13)

If my faith were a picture it would not be recognizable by those who haven’t seen me in two years. God is good all the time.

Beans, coleslaw, church - all side dishes

2005-02-08T18:19:00.000-08:00

I feel like I should preface this with the truth that many good things in the ministry I work with are happening, God is moving. Of late the frustration has been overwhelming - and this blog gives me a place to vent.

We had planned a youth ski retreat for January and had to cancel due to no snow. OK that's legitimate. The ski retreat was rescheduled for this coming weekend - and no doubt I have been absolutely pumped about it. I was looking forward to skiing, traveling to a new place (Erie, PA) and spending quality time with some kids that I don't know incredibly well.

We had 5 kids planning on going, not a huge group, but definitely worth the trip. By 4:00 today all but one had bailed. The trip has been canceled. I am incredibly disheartened. Three of the youth have decided that they will be attending a high school Valentine's dance on Saturday night instead of going skiing. What a lame excuse! This speaks volumes to me - 1st - it tells me that God is not a priority, church is a sidedish. 2nd - why aren't the parents having their kids follow through on a commitment they made? I know! I know! Maybe the parents met in high school and have the same dream for their child. Surely they will meet that "perfect" person at a high school Valentine's dance - oh, how romantic.

Sigh...I don't know what to do. I know in my head that these kids canceling is not something I should take personally, but I am having a hard time convincing my heart otherwise. It makes me feel a little bit like a failure, maybe that makes me selfish. I love these kids, more than anything I want them to experience Christ like I have - so a missed opportunity for them bums me out.

Ok, here's one other thing (opinions on what I should do, if anything, are more than welcome.) Last weekend I saw one of the youth and her boyfriend buying a pregnancy test and condoms are the grocery store. I immediately hid (in the ethnic food lane.)

I have gone through many scenarios in my head - as to why one would buy these two things (I realize it's not rocket science.)

1. Maybe they are for a friend - not likely.
2. The girl thiks maybe (a big maybe) she is pregnant - but in the case that she is not she will continue to have sex, though protected. (Apparently the thought of being pregnant didn't scare her too much)
3. They haven't had sex yet, but have made the decision to. So they buy condoms to practice safe sex, and a pregnancy test just In case.

I don't know this girl well. I "feel" I should keep my mouth shut as to what I saw. I don't want to alienate her. My thought is that by saying nothing I am more likely to be able to continue to build a relationship with her as I have been, thus she will be more likely to open up to me as she needs. But do I have a responsibility to say something?

odds and ends

2005-02-01T18:07:00.000-08:00

It has been a while since I have posted – here are some odds and ends. Nothing incredibly grand.

Last week was kind of a bummer. Church politics got the best of me. But I believe I have been faithful to God’s will and fruit will come of the direction taken.

I am finding that my biggest challenge with youth ministry right now is parents. I am convinced that I only have one set of parents who actually have a relationship with Christ. Sigh…is that my judgment to make? I’m not sure. Can we make a judgment for righteousness? I think so…

By the middle of last week I had become nearly furious with the lack of enthusiasm and desire for Christ that the parents at my church have. Maybe I have gone about the ministry incorrectly. Up to this point I haven’t focused on the faith of the entire family, mainly just the kids. So, I am taking a step back, evaluating, and visioning to restructure the ministry to include the entire family. I spend a great deal of time begging parents and kids to get involved. It is exhausting. Again I remind myself that I am called to be faithful, good things are happening, and I am not in the outcome business.

Yesterday I had a different experience. I ran the sound board for a memorial service at church. I had never met the deceased. It was strange to sit through the service having no connection to this woman at all. I felt out of place being the only person in the room not mourning the death. When I laid down for bed last night and rehashed my day I realized I hadn’t thought of the memorial service once since leaving the sanctuary. Hmm….

I spent two hours on the phone with DELL yesterday, though an hour of it was on hold. The keyboard on my laptop quit working on Saturday. I was very impressed with lady who helped me out. She was patient, she had an accent but I was able to understand her. Though we were not able to get the keyboard working we were able to determine that replacing the part would fix the problem.

This week has been good. I have a sense of peace about a number of things. Please keep my parents in your prayers. They are seeking new employment. Mom has a second interview on Thursday – it looks promising.

Blessings!

Simplicity in Prayer

2005-01-16T00:55:00.000-08:00

“Anne Lamott claims the two best prayers she knows are ‘Help me, help me, help me, and ‘Thank you, thank you, thank you.’” (Check out her book Traveling Mercies)

I have found these prayers incredibly refreshing in the past days. Simple, to the point, and heartfelt.

Best Reality TV Ever!!!

2005-01-09T18:43:00.000-08:00

FOOTBALL!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS PACK!

Tsunami

2005-01-06T17:10:00.000-08:00

Hey all read this article. It is great to see how many different ways people/churches are supporting the tsunami relief - God is moving.

Nice write-up Heather! Thanks.

36 Minute Pledge

2004-12-31T13:02:00.000-08:00

The tsunami is horrifying. At times the death toll and the anguish that the living must feel reels in my mind, but I find more often that the disaster is a long way from my mind.

Earlier today I was online talking to Daniel, a student in youth group. He was bothered by his lack of emotion for the disaster as a whole – saying if it really mattered to him he felt like it should be at the forefront of his mind. We discussed the disaster at length and pondered what it must really be like. We wondered how much of our lack of emotion was due to being “desensitized.” We realized that being as far away as we are lends itself to a defense mechanism. It just isn’t tangible. We asked the question, “Is God guarding our hearts from the real pain of the disaster?”

This conversation was good, a blessing, one of those times when you feel you are being led by the Spirit. Daniel and I both felt that doing nothing was not an option, nor what God was calling us to do. Daniel voiced that he does not have any money but needed to do something. We did a little figuring. The last figure I read is that approximately 130,000 people have perished. We figured that if we thought of each of these people for just one second it would take about 2167 minutes, calculating to just over 36 hours. That is unbelievable. Because we can’t pray for 36 hours a day, we have pledged to spend 36 minutes a day in prayer for the disaster as a whole. We will recalculate the number daily as needed.

This is a way for us to make the disaster more tangible, a way for us to grip the reality just a tiny bit, a way for us to make a difference. I pray that those of you reading this would also make some type of pledge to help in disaster relief.

I thank God now, in confidence, for answering our prayers.

Quote for Today

2004-12-28T22:56:00.000-08:00

I find myself wondering if my thought process is crazy relatively often. So I enjoyed this statement made by my friend Eric in a conversation earlier this evening.

"Are we normal or is everyone else in this world crazy, making THEM normal and we're crazy?"

Minnesota Christmas

2004-12-27T13:21:00.000-08:00

My time in Minnesota with my family has been good - truly a blessing. I have to admit, I am a bit bummed over the lack of snow here - but a "brown Christmas" is a prayer come true for my dad. From what I hear when I return to Ohio on Thursday I will be greeted by mounds of the white stuff (and hopefully temperatures a bit warmer.) :)

It is tradition for my family to go to the 5:00 service on Christmas Eve. As you may very well know the 5:00 service posed a bit of a scheduling conflict this year for those Viking and Packer fans. Many churches in the area altered their Christmas Eve services to accommodate the game (I’m not sure how I feel about that.) Anyway - we discussed going to a noon service so that we could watch the entire game but decided that we would tape the end of the game and stick with tradition, plus I really enjoy the candle lit service.

Upon entering the sanctuary on Christmas Eve I immediately realize - no candles. What this must be some kind of mistake! Nope - it was no mistake at all. Prior to the Call to Woship the pastor explains that many of the elderly women in the congregation have voiced their concerns about using candles during the service - apparently they are worried about their hair starting on fire. (I can just hear the committee meeting.) So during offering the ushers passed out dumpy little flashlights, and we sang Silent Night with lighting that mimicked a circus tent. Oh, Well.

Unfortunately my disappointment over the candles was quickly fogged by the embarrassing loss of the Vikings. Not only did they lose but I lost $2 on a bet that was my idea, and spent 60 cents in text messages bragging about the Vikes. That’s all right, it is very possible we’ll meet again in the playoffs - then we will beat them on their own turf.

I biffed it last night on a patch of ice the was about one square foot. It was a graceful fall, nonetheless embarrassing. I was in the company of my sister and my cousin Nathan. I was actually running to Nathan to give a hug when I came across this small patch of ice. If you have lived in Minnesota for any period of time you know that you can count on landing on your can at least a couple times during the frozen season (early November - late March.) I road the bus as a kid (and a teenager.) I recall betting on which kid would be the first to wipe-out on their way to the bus. When someone would finally bite-it the entire bus would cheer. It was a great form of entertainment then, but now I feel like a jerk for ever having participated. It is no wonder so many kids hate school.

I know this is getting long, but one more tidbit. I played a new game last night called Hilarium. It is indeed hilarious. Basically it is a chaotic game of charades - my favorite charade being "a constipated chicken." I will be purchasing Hilarium as soon as I get back to Ohio.

I hope you all had a blessed Christmas.

Wireless

2004-12-18T11:17:00.000-08:00

I am once again exploring the coffee shops in Springfield. They are rotten. I have a new requirement – wireless capability. Yes, yes, it is true. I bought the little gizmo for my laptop, got it working on my own :) and am now wireless. It is exciting. I have found that my apartment is a bit of a “hotspot.” The connection I am able to get is “very poor,” and a bit dishonest considering I am piggybacking on someone else’s wireless account.

I am at Coffee Expressions. It is ok. The coffee is decent and the atmosphere is what I would call “cute.” The music is dumpy. The wireless connection is splendid. Here is the kicker – the two employees are OBVIOUSLY dating. When not waiting on guests they sit together at a table, play footsy and kissy face – while on occasion he kisses/licks her hand, really it is very romantic (gag.) They are currently arguing, after not being able to decide what movie to see tonight; Christmas with the Kranks or Spanglish. It is obvious I am invading their personal time.

Tension is rising between the couple, she is crying – so I believe it is my time to exit. I head back to Minnesota on Tuesday for Christmas with the family. Quality coffee shops are abundant in Minnesota, something I am looking forward to.

BLAH!!

2004-12-03T22:24:00.000-08:00

I am struggling to find my groove today. My thoughts are distracting. I have a strange dream life. Over the past months I have been having a reoccurring dream – what should one take from this, if anything. I have read through the book of Daniel – hoping for clarity, insight, or direction, hmmm….still wondering.

Someday I Hope to...

2004-12-01T10:46:00.000-08:00

dance in the rain
see the Vikings win the Super Bowl
complete a century ride
skydive
be debt free
have guts like Peter, the Disciple
lead worship around a campfire
see a sunset in Greece
eat correctly with chopsticks
travel the Holy Land
be a volunteer youth worker
snorkel in Australia
be a wife and mom
have a porch swing
rock climb
be a morning person
see Rockefeller Center during the Christmas season
adopt, maybe
read the Bible cover to cover
go on a cruise with my sister
visit Hershey, PA
see the Lord of the Rings movies
have a huge yard where all the neighborhoods kids come to play
take a road trip to the east coast
teach children to read
treat my parents to a lavish dinner out
dance with Jesus

Dreaming is so fun – it is worship. Have a blessed day, and dance, dance, dance (it is more fun with new socks on)

Janesville, MN - Population 2,400

2004-11-25T08:24:00.000-08:00

I am home (Minnesota) this weekend for Thanksgiving. It is great, and was a complete surprise to my parents. I think my Dad even called me a "little stinker."

Yesterday while shopping with Mom I ran into an old high school friend, it turned out that "everyone" was going to be getting together that evening to hangout, drink and catch up. The plan was to meet at the Thirsty Beaver around 9:30. I thought why not go, it will be great to see what everyone is up, where their lives have taken them - exciting. Honestly I hadn’t talked to most of them in four years if not longer.

I arrive at the Thirsty Beaver and am a bit nervous, knowing I am not at all the same person I was in High School (thank you Jesus.) The place is packed, but I recognize a majority of the faces. I spot "the girls" in the corner and beeline for them, hoping for some sort of welcome and comfort in this strange place. I get hugs from the girls and they ask me how I am and no kidding everyone of them asked me if I was married. What? That was weird to me, like I hadn’t "arrived" because I am not married. After a bit of small talk I made my way to the bar to get a beer, finding myself next to John, an ex boyfriend. Conversation with John was good, probably one of least uncomfortable moments of the evening. Though his friends stood behind us razzing him about talking to me while we caught up. Something’s never change.

These girls are great people, but Janesville, MN, where I went to High School, is about 2,400 people strong. Of the 7 girls who I spent a good amount of my time with 5 of them are married to their High School sweetheart or someone from Janseville, and the other two have found love within 100 miles from Janseville. As the night wore on I began to get that old High School feeling - "I just don’t fit in, I feel like a dork" I am wondering after all of this time why do I still get this strange feeling and then I recognize the truth. I have changed a great deal, but Janseville MN is still Janesville MN, and though no one else was probably looking at me thinking "Angie doesn’t fit in, she’s a dork," it is true, I do not fit in, nor do I hope to and I am a dork, and I like it. And that realization was the greatest blessing of the evening. I am so blessed to be where I am, to have had the opportunity to stray from Ho-dunk Janseville, MN, and to have made friends who have taken the time to truly get to know me.

After all the weirdness of the evening I’m glad I spent some time at the Thirsty Beaver.

Charades

2004-11-09T11:04:00.000-08:00

Last night while playing charades during New Community (children’s ministry) Gracie drew “Pig” as her charade. Gracie is in third grade and is the older sister of Sophie (from previous post, Worth it All.) Gracie enters the room and begins acting like a pig. She simply pushes her nose up with her finger, giving her a pig nose. The kids guess immediately, yelling “pig, pig, pig.” Then Gracie shouts, “Well shoot, I thought someone would guess Michael Jackson.”

Cecil and Lime's Cafe

2004-11-04T12:50:00.000-08:00

Once a week I treat myself to lunch out; alone, but with a book. Since moving to Springfield I haven’t found a “regular” place that completely suites my taste. My ideal “regular” place would serve great coffee (yet probably overpriced), have an eclectic atmosphere, and lend itself to the comfort of opening a book.

Last January I visited a place named Strange Brew. Strange Brew was dark, small, and smelled of lavender incense. Upon entering Strange Brew I was immediately asked to leave, without explanation. Naively I hesitated and looked behind me, figuring the server was asking someone else to leave. That was not the case at all. It turned out that Strange Brew was a vegan restaurant (for animal rights reasons.) I was wearing a leather jacket. I obliged and left. The remainder of my day was dumpy and I actually wondered if a curse had been placed on me (not likely.)

Strange Brew closed some months ago, and has since been reopened, under different owners, as Cecil and Lime’s café. Yesterday I visited the new café. It was delightful. Not exactly what I am looking for but it will do. It has great décor; bold yet not overwhelming colors, art, and quality classical music playing (no Kenny G.) I had a turkey club with guacamole (a favorite) a diet coke, and opened my book. They have coffee, maybe I will drop by later in the week to try it.

I am reading Searching for God Knows What, by Donald Miller (author of Blue Like Jazz.) What struck me most about my reading today while at Cecil and Lime’s Café was this sentence: “If you happened to be a person who thought they knew everything about God, Jesus would have been completely annoying.”

Have a blessed day my friends.

Anticipation

2004-10-26T11:35:00.000-07:00

I am finding myself really enjoying this time of year. There is lots of anticipation. The kids at church are past the excitement of the new school year. There new shoes are broken in and they have gone from science being the best part of the day to living for recess and lunch – normalcy returns. The anticipation comes with the changing of seasons, the excitement of kids picking out Halloween costumes and the holidays around the corner, and the election, I suppose.

The leaf color in Ohio is far more brilliant and intense than it is in Minnesota. The beauty in the leaves dieing amazes me, I guess it reflects the beauty in death, of sorts. I was thinking about this the other day after I talked to my grandparents. My grandfather’s brother has been given just a few days to live, and though my Grandparents are grieving they know that beauty and piece awaits Uncle Connie (and so does Uncle Connie.) There is anticipation in dieing, the hope is freeing.

We just celebrated vision Sunday at church. Visioning for the church as well as for my personal life is one of the most exciting and comforting parts of my prayer life. I suppose because it gives hope and destination. It opens the door to the unknown, the could be anticipated. It feeds a person’s wonder. It lends itself to resolution. Dreaming, wondering, and anticipating God’s will gives us hope, it helps us endure, we receive joy from it; more importantly so does God. Asking God for His will is trusting that He has plans that are more than our imagination, bigger than our dreams. Is the craving we have to know what is next God’s whisper wooing us?

Dreaming, hoping, and wondering are worship, but so is enjoying today, knowing that “This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” (Psalm 118:24) So, one also has to see the beauty in not anticipating.

forever a dork

2004-10-20T07:30:00.000-07:00

On my way to work this morning I caught myself singing into my hand, like it was a microphone, to Bryan Adams Everything I do I do it for You, while enjoying reminiscing about junior high.

I laughed and thought, “I am as much of a dork now as I was in junior high, the difference is now I think being a dork is cool.”

i eat too

2004-10-13T12:23:00.000-07:00

I ran into a woman from my church at the grocery store yesterday. I said “hi,” and she said “Well, I guess even a youth pastor has to eat.” The comment caught me off guard. I simply wrinkled my nose and said “yeah, I guess so.”

I’ve let the simple comment fester for a few hours now. I wonder, is this perception one the women has of every “ministry leader” or is it one I emit? On one hand I feel bad for the women if she “feels” that every person in a role like mine has it all together (an assumption made from her comment.) On the other hand it bothers me a great deal to think that it is only me she sees as having it all together.

This isn’t the first time in the last few months that I have received a comment of this nature. It is incredibly uncomfortable to think that people have put you in such a high place in their minds that you can do no wrong, you feel no pain, or worry of nothing. I too have struggles and needs. Being in a leadership role is an interesting place. There is a line of allowing oneself to be vulnerable while still being a productive leader? What does “everyone” need to know, and what is better left unknown? Do we have a higher level of trust in those whose vulnerable/sensitive side we have seen? I think we can be genuine without being provocative with our “happenings” and “feelings.”

I see the things and people I am surrounded by changing very quickly with drama; thoughts, ideas, patterns. I wonder too, if I am seen by others in this change. I enjoy change, it should be embraced. I don’t want to be perceived as having “arrived.” Going back to the woman at the grocery store makes me realize that I am surrounded by people, on a regular basis, who believe they know me, but they know me as “Angela the youth minister.” I almost never think of myself in that manner. But what is perceived by others is their reality. That perception might not be founded on logic, but to them it is real. Should what is perceived of us match our reality (are we at all in control of that?) Is it that the leaders of Christianity have put up such a façade, or that perceived reality is so skewed, that those we hope to teach are not able to see that we are where we are out of need – that need being Christ.

TWINS

2004-10-06T13:26:00.000-07:00

We're gonna win Twins, we're gonna score,
we're gonna win Twins watch that baseball soar.
Knock out a homerun, holler hip-hooray,
cheer for the Minnesota Twins today!

It could happen.

Legalism

2004-10-04T12:32:00.000-07:00

Irritating quote from Sunday (said in serious tone): "Angela I'm not sure that you should be working in the church considering you were born on Halloween."

Lucky I don't have a sensitive gag reflex.

Certain things

2004-10-02T13:02:00.000-07:00

There are certain things that just shouldn't be. Here are a few:

"Regular" food at Dairy Queen
Vending machines at the Y
Pet Spiders
Low carb options at Panera
Certain Revivals, let me explain. This summer we experienced the revival of Wilson Phillips. Bad idea! Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse it has. My morning started out wonderfully. I slept in, made myself a great cup of coffee, and cuddled into my favorite blanket on the couch, all was calm. Then I turned on the TV only to see Cyndi Lauper freak dancing and what I would call shouting on my screen. Why? I realize that girls just want to have fun, but come on.

A Note to my Lovely Little Sister

2004-09-29T12:02:00.000-07:00

Decisions are hard, but also freeing. I remember when I finally dropped the education half of my music degree, it was freeing. But I also had feelings of guilt and probably even shame. I would walk around the Performing Arts Center avoiding profs. I didn’t want to talk to them, hear their disbelief and “you would be a great band director.” Those thoughts and feelings quickly passed when I realized I was bringing them on myself.

One thing I know, life is worth enjoying. Whether your passion falls in your line of work or not isn’t important. But it is important that your lifestyle allows you to have passion for something.

Linds, enjoy this time. Weigh your options and don’t make an impulse decision. Listen to both your head and your heart, pray like mad, then listen for God's wisper. You would make a great head doctor and you would also make a great restaurant manager – and in any case you would be loved, respected, and admired the same.

I’m excited for you!

May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.
Psalm 20:4

Wife Swap

2004-09-27T11:35:00.000-07:00

When I first heard of Wife Swap, a new ABC reality show, I swore I wouldn’t participate in watching it. The title “Wife Swap” itself irritated me. I quickly jumped to the conclusion that the show was going to negate the role of a wife and mother, make women look incompetent (I bet you’re thinking I’m a feminist, I’m not, well, at least not by my definition…haha) and be about sex.

Last night I found myself tuned into the primer of Wife Swap. I have to admit I was incredibly entertained. The show is not at all what I anticipated. It is a simple concept that deemed very intriguing, at least to me. Check this link for details on the show. The families on last night’s show were what I would call extreme. One family had 25 pets, which all lived inside, while the other family wasn’t aloud to make noise while in the house. The family dynamics in these two households were both crazy, two different types of crazy. I wonder if anyone would think my family is crazy.

Destination Marriage

2004-09-24T08:02:00.000-07:00

I saw this woman on TV this morning while I was getting ready. Her name is Blaire and she has a goal of being engaged by this December (she is 27 and feels “it is time.”) Blaire has set up a website to find her husband, that’s right she hasn’t met him yet. She describes herself as well as her future husband (somehow this rubs me the wrong way) on her site, among other things. This irritates me on many levels. Is anyone else bothered by this?

I have dated 2 men at what I would call “at length,” and a handful not so long, but my experience would tell me a couple of things. (These are opinions, not to be taken as otherwise)
1. Destination marriage mentality scares off most self-respecting, motivated men.
2. You miss out on the whole person if your goal is marriage.
3. You are running the risk of selling yourself short, by being completely marriage minded.
4. Life is about a whole lot more than being married.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I hope to be married and have a family someday. It just bothers me a great deal when marriage becomes a need for someone rather than a desire. (Maybe I am assuming about Blaire…)

Check it out for yourself (take special note to her line of work) http://www.marryblaire.com/

Worth it All

2004-09-20T14:18:00.000-07:00

For an upcoming youth ministry convention each youth director has been asked to submit a story that has made our job "worth it all." So here it goes...

Sophie is a five-year-old, “free-spirited,” girl who has warmed my heart from the minute I met her. She seeks me out on Sunday mornings just to give me a hug – I look forward to it. Sophie pushes the line every chance she gets. She has been known to stick her cat in the fridge as well as successfully stuffing it into the coffee pot, so she is sure to find it when she feels like playing with it later– smart girl.

On one particular Sunday Sophie insisted on sitting in with the older kids, with her brother and sister. There is no success in persuading or arguing with Sophie, so I didn’t. So Sophie attended the older kid’s class, parked on my lap the entire lesson. As a class we were discussing the Trinity. The kids were asking many questions, probably the most probing being “How can God be God and Jesus be God at the same time, and how do we get Him in our heart?” Sophie had seemingly become very bored by the discussion as she picked at her toes while she sat on my lap. As the class drew on I had to remind myself not to become irritated by Sophie, knowing full well that she would probably be learning more if she was in the class with kids her age.

The following Sunday Sophie came barreling through the church doors hollering, at the top of her lungs “Angela I want to give you a hug.” After giving me a hug she told me she had something to show me. Sophie opened up the pocket on her little dress and asked me to look inside. I did, it was empty. I quickly said “Sophie there is nothing in there.” She said “Well Angela, you said we have to have Jesus in our hearts, and I couldn’t figure out how to get Him in there, so I just put Him in my pocket every morning.”

Seaweed

2004-09-15T16:34:00.000-07:00

I woke this morning at 4:30 to a horrifying dream I was being sucked into the depths of Gull Lake (a Minnesota favorite) by seaweed. My bed sheet was completely wrapped around both of my legs. “Good Morning,” I thought to myself. I wasn’t able to fall back asleep, so I read. I am reading a book titled Blue Like Jazz, Non-religious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality, by Donald Miller. It is one of those books that you either like or don’t. The book is challenging me spiritually, getting me to think out of my own “God Box.”(“God Box,” something I think most of us have, it makes us comfortable and secure, often keeps us from stretching…) I’ll elaborate more when I finish the book.

Fruit of the Spirit Award

2004-09-13T09:46:00.000-07:00

I had Cluster on Friday. Cluster is a network of youth directors, who meet monthly, and are Tentmaker trained – I enjoy it. Each month someone is awarded the “Fruit of the Spirit” award. The award is given by the cluster member who received the award the previous month. I was awarded the “Fruit of the Spirit” award on Friday, for exemplifying patience in my ministry and in life in general. I felt special, it was nice.

I’m looking forward to awarding someone next month.

now hiring.

2004-09-12T13:16:00.000-07:00

I went to McDonalds for lunch on Saturday afternoon. I frequent McDonalds probably less than half a dozen times a year. Anyways, that’s not the point. As I was walking in a girl, I’m going to guess she was about 8, and an older man, I ASSUME he was her father, were walking out, lunch in hand. The girl was wearing a tight, midriff-revealing, t-shirt that simply said “now hiring.”

Are you kidding me? I had to tell myself to continue into the restaurant (my instinct was to drop-kick the man with the girl.) Now maybe I jumped too quickly to the conclusion that her t-shirt was “provocative,” but in my mind “now hiring.” insinuated prostituting.

Now, like I said, this girl was about 8. She cannot possibly know what the statement on her shirt declares, and I can probably guess she did not buy it herself. Ah, yes, this concludes that it is most likely that an adult bought it for her. And she was with a man, probably her father, who was allowing her to wear the shirt.

This absolutely disgusts me. We live in a society where sex has become a game. We have become desensitized to the emotional and physical ramifications of promiscuous sex. As a youth director I have the opportunity to encourage girls to dress classy and elegant rather than “sexy” (I am very aware that today’s worldly fashion says the opposite.) I hope to instill morals that are Christ centered. I wish that these young girls could understand what their provocative outfits do to their bothers-in-Christ, both their age and older. It is an uphill battle, considering parents are as naïve (put nicely) as our young people. There is no excuse for it parents.

Clutter Blindness

2004-09-07T07:25:00.000-07:00

My office tends to have piles of crap all over. It doesn't bother me. Sunday morning an adult was sitting on the couch in my office and said "my gosh you suffer from clutter blindness." My outward reaction wasn't more than.."hmmm."

I guess if I do have "clutter blindness," and am actually blind to clutter, I wouldn't be the one suffering.

Probably the only time I would actually "suffer" from my own clutter blindness, would be when I visit Mom and am reminded to pick up my stuff. Or in the case that I would trip and fall on clutter and bust up my face.

Today - A Very Good Place

2004-09-03T16:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the perfect day. It was one of those days where you realize that “being” is good. I have learned more over the past year that there is an incredible difference between friends and acquaintances. I have been burned. But in the past few months I have come into more than one REAL friendship.

I went hiking with a precious friend yesterday. We talked about our families, relationships, money, and politics, both government and church. We discussed our dreams and hopes, but when it came down to what mattered, it was that moment. I sometimes, and I can probably say women in general, have an awful tendency to need an outcome, a destination, a final point. Why is this? What is it that keeps us from enjoying what we have right now? I don’t know if it is more in the way we are “wired” or if it is the need to fulfill the “American Façade.”

I truly believe that the American Façade is not our heaven on earth. We were not created to fit into a mold. Look around you, God is more than a pattern. I currently have many “friends” who are marriage bond, seemingly sprinting towards their final point, their finish line. If they aren’t in the depths of planning an intricate wedding they are “on the prowl.” Wondering where is he, Mr. Right? Spending day in and day out, not satisfied without him, in a state of need. Girls, marriage is not a need, it is a desire. How many men have you dismissed as jerks or crap because they didn’t fit into your “husband box?” Is *looking* for a husband manipulative in itself? I tend to think so. This is why I have a hard time being setup on dates. I don’t enjoy meeting men on the premise of romance or even marriage – it isn’t fair. Can we not enjoy people for who they are and where they are at – rather than what more YOU think they could/should be?

I’m in a place in life where things with my family are up in the air, health issues are at hand. I have an incredible job, it is rewarding, energizing, stressful, and unpredictable. I have REAL friends. I am single. I live alone, and enjoy it. I experience the grace of God on a daily basis. I put my hopes and dreams in Christ’s hands – and I enjoy where I am at – a very good place. That place simply being “today.”